Don’s Comic Delights

Aries:   You know fate can be cruel. you’ve seen your share of it, up close and personal. You are the only one who can play out your hand.  Today, you have to bluff in order to play the position well.

Garfield:  I had a busy day today.  Oh, so did we. What did you do? Uhhh…Garfield puts up both paws and thinks, “Sorry. No follow-up questions.”

Blondie:  Mr. Ditthers: There’s a rumor going ariound that I have unpredictable mood swings, Bumstead.  He chuckles and continues, Isn’t that about the craziest thing you ever heard?  Yessir. WHAT’S  THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN, BUMSTEAD??!!

Pickles:  Anything good in the news, Earl? No, I’m just reading the obituaries. I find it kind of amazing.  What’s that?  That people seem to die in alphabetical order.

Hagar:  RIP Sven Larsson.  At the grave site, his wife asks in belligerent tone to the Monk, Do you think my pathetic, inadequate, weak, idiot husband is in HELL??  Hagar who is in the waiting line of mourners, says to his right-hand man, Not anymore!!

Beetle Bailey:  It’s past your curfew! I was on a date with Miss Buxley. It’s hard to get mad at Beetle when he smells of Miss Buxley’s perfume and her lipstick shows the nature of their affection for each other.

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