Don’s Coffee Tidings

Aries – You’ve a unique kind of confidence.  You provide something different for everyone.

Pickles –  Why do I find it so hard to write something on our Christmas cards?  Look at all these cards with personal messages so nicely and neatly written.  This one for example is a photo Christmas greeting from our senator showing his whole family;  we sent him a donation last election.  My goodness, the family keeps growing.  This stack is from people we haven’t seen in years–long colorful letters filled with updated lives.  Here’s one, it is signed the family Fromm. Who are they?  I have no idea!

Hagar –  The doctor tells Hagar that raiding castles is dangerous work. “When was the last time you got hurt?” I don’t recall right now. (Thankfully he isn’t covered by The Affordable Care Act–better known as “Obamacare”).  His body guard trooper answers the doctor with, “It was the time he forgot to bring back some loot for Helga!”

Socialist Dogma –  Look kid, you dress like a bum; you got $300 to divvy up for a month’s rent.  You must be kidding. My girl and I need a place to stay until I find work.  Look kid, jobs are scarce.  They don’t pay much for your level of education. In our capitalist system, all I can get you is a RAT HOLE.  Take my advice for what its worth.  You two should join the Army or Navy and see the world.

Shoe –  I’ve been doing some digging into Senator ….family tree.  What did you find out?  He was born on the shady side of it.

The Family Circle –  (Mother points at her four children outside of a department store). “Remember now, we’re shopping for Daddy.  We will not be stopping in any toy stores or toy departments.”

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